Just Like Last Year, I'm Waiting

As I sit here listening to Scottish bagpipes wail the Scottish national anthem, I ponder when in hell my father is going to get here.

There's a certain loveliness to the bagpipes, but it's an acquired thing, I believe. Some people can't fathom why anyone would want to hear that sort of pitch in a piece of music. I'm not Scottish, but I like them. And not just because David Tennant is Scottish. That's not it at all.

I believe I'm ready to go. I don't think I can pack anymore in my bag, anyway. Now I'm just waiting to be stuffed into the car with my sisters and Dad.

Oh the joy of holidays! No extended family to deal with and four days of being crammed in the house with my mother and sisters. I will come back with scratches, dents, dings, or other injuries sustained while living/coping/being around immediate family.

Anna will start in with Sara, I'll start in on Anna, Mom will start in on me, and it might end with one of us stuffed headfirst into a turkey carcass and covered in cranberries. Or it could end with Death by Cornbread Stuffing.

Love is in the air, as long as I leave enough chocolates for everyone else and refrain from going mad on the pumpkin pie (Dad's fave. He'd kill for it).

As long as no one chokes on their roll and forces me to do the Heimleich, we're good. I had CPR training certification once, only given to me because I got strapped to a backboard during practice with the toys and couldn't get off of the table I was lying on. You try moving when your arms and legs are splinted down and your neck's in a neck brace, with your head bandaged down.

I was lying there, yowling for help from someone and they were all off playing with the mannequins and the rat poison. Pay no never mind to the poor person lying half MUMMIFIED on the table...

They felt sorry for me, I believe, as I wasn't that good at anything CPR related. And then I spent the entire year I was certified thinking someone was going to attempt to die in front of me and I would have to be the one to save them.

Luckily, if someone tried it now, I could claim that I was years out of practice and that would prompt someone who knew what the hell they were doing to do it instead. Not that I wouldn't save someone if I was the only person, but I'd be terrified of screwing it up. And yes, I know about the Good Samaritan law.

So, having wandered totally off topic, my sister just told me they'll be here in about an hour. Joy.

Ta,
Bec