Long Day

Today started out at 6:15 and ended about 13 hours later, with hardly a break in between. I worked, I was tutored, I was classed twice, and then I went to a meeting.

Tutoring was the funnest today, thanks to my tutor now actually wanting to teach me today and me not wanting to be there at all. Wonder what it'd be like to be on the same page for once? I personally, just wanted to go and eat something and take painkillers because my hands and right elbow were achy and were protesting being used.

That seemed to be the theme today-I must have wound up writing several pages today, despite them.

On a different tack, I'm not totally sure why I continue to go to church if only one student will talk to me (I've known Lindsey probably since she was about 4 or 5, seeing as we were one year apart in gradeschool.) I know I'm not popular or pretty or anything, but would it really kill them to hang around with me for a bit?

And another thing: I hate this whole Homecoming thing. Hate. It. I am in college; I thought we were all beyond this high school stuff. It's a snarky popular thing, designed, I think, to remind me of what I am not. Does it matter in the grand scheme of things who's popular and who's not? I believe no. I think I'll come out better than a lot of these popular people because A) I started out not pretty-I've got nothing to lose B) I started out a nobody, and obviously that will not change and C) Who's coming out more with their feet on the ground-me or someone with the looks of a Barbie/Ken doll?

I was never even near popular. I was a reject because I had long hair and a beaky nose and glasses. I wrote too much, I was too smart, and I tended to gravitate toward people who were like me. I didn't and don't drive, I have had one boyfriend (didn't work out) and my mother is beginning to believe that she must lie to her own family in order to prove to them that I am not a lesbian (no way, but she's apparently worried about my reputation. Thanks, Mom, for the vote of confidence)

I don't have a problem with others doing this whole popularity snark-go ahead, waste your time. Vote. See who cares in ten years. But leave me out of it entirely.

That said, today was another slog through the fairies. Tomorrow will be easier. One class, one shift at work, I get up at 9 on Saturday and do my thing, and Sunday I go to church and keep up appearances. If I look and smell like a Christian, those who drink booze will leave me alone.

And so will the Christians. :+)

Night,
Bec